I haven’t written a post for a while! Since leaving China, in fact. OK, let’s see…..
I got home with no problems - no missed flights or mistakenly ending up in Russia! It was all relatively straight forward anyway, I knew where I was going and so I just did it. I even spent a night in a foreign country by myself, I feel so grown up!
After getting home I settled right back in to normal life. I took a couple of weeks to have a rest and relax, and in that time I caught up on all my recorded TV programmes, relished the peace I had with no children running about/stealing my things, and no family members shouting.
And for the past 3-4 weeks I’ve been searching for a job. Today I went for my first Jobcentre interview, so as soon as my claim is accepted I’ll have about £50 each week. Not much, but I ain’t complaining!
I’ve applied to about 12 adverts, but it’s so difficult to find jobs that don’t specify things that I don’t have to offer, like a certain number of years’ experience. Hopefully I’ll be employed soon so I can stop feeling so negative.
It’s a mixture of things really - coming back to find things have changed and many people I know have moved on to the next inevitable stage in life, be it finding partners, first homes or having children. I feel like I’m being left behind, I actually have to keep reminding myself that I’m a year behind everyone else anyway due to the extra year at University. Two, if you count the gap year beforehand as well…
It doesn’t help that I want to move out so badly and be independent, but don’t have the means to without a steady job. And it’s so darn hard just finding one, let alone finding one I have enough experience for and would be capable of doing. It’s really frustrating. I keep seeing things in shops that I’d buy to decorate my eventual house!
I also seem to go through waves of wanting to go out with friends, and then the negativity sets in and I don’t want to see anyone and I resent everyone for having the things I want. *sigh*.
Never mind. I’ll focus on getting a job for now, then the only way is up. Life will go on.
